Living next door to Lucy!

I’m in trouble again. I did nothing wrong but I’m in trouble again and now I’m stuck in my room on a gorgeous day. I was going to climb out the window and escape but my stupid brother is watching from the garden. I swear he loves it when I get in trouble coz it means Mammy won’t be watching him and he can do what he likes. And he will do what he likes coz he’s bold like that whereas I’m good all the time and still get in trouble (not all the time in fact I’m never good but Mammy doesn’t need to know that)
only this time I did nothing wrong, well I broke my sisters high heeled shoes when I robbed them to dress up. That’s not even a crime especially since Mammy won’t buy me high heels she says I’m not old enough, I’m eight for crying out loud and then she had the cheek to say I could borrow her shoes ha her shoes are granny shoes and I know for a fact Lucy Ewing from Dallas would not be seen in Mammy’s shoes so how could I possibly be seen in them.

I didn’t mean to break the blasted shoe, I was practising turning while swinging my hair, Lucy does it in such an amazing way her hair goes all the way down her back and when she turns one way her hair turns the other, it’s amazing. Anyway I tried it and turned over on my ankle then all hell broke loose. I could have been killed but did anyone care oh no it’s all about the bloody shoes in this house. “Mammy, Valerie stole my shoes and deliberately broke them” that was such an exaggeration and while I could be dead on the floor Mammy came storming through with a tea towel  swinging from her hand, ranting and raving about how I’m always causing trouble. Some of these days she’ll come with the tea towel and it’ll be too late, one of my sisters will have killed me and then what! Then it’ll be jail for a sister and a lifetime of heart ship for mammy, she’d never get over it her best daughter in the world ever dying on her.

When I tried to explain myself to Mammy later about the shoes and Lucy’s hair and how I’m destined to be like Lucy Ewing, who should overhear us only Daddy and if there is one thing that drives my Daddy crazy it’s me watching Dallas. He reckons its full of filth and adultery and corrupts people’s minds, I don’t even know what those words mean, well I know what filth means coz I’m always filthy from climbing trees and digging holes, but I don’t know what adultery means so how can I get corrupted, really adults can be so stupid sometimes.

And Daddy should have been more supportive of my plight especially after the trauma I’ve been through. I still don’t know if JR is alive after being shot, oh it was terrible someone walked in and shot him, just like that and now it’s finished for the summer and I’m really worried, the news said Sue Ellen did it but what if it was Lucy, JR is always being mean to her (we have so much in common, everyone is mean to me all the time) so what if she did it oh I’d die if she went to jail, I would I’d die. Why couldn’t I live next door to Southfork then she’d have me to confide in. Life is so unfair.

Then not only did Daddy send me to my room on a sunny day but he banned me from watching Dallas for life, which is impossible and very cruel coz Dallas is my life and then he also told me to watch a little more Bosco. BOSCO!!!! Is my Daddy completely crazy? How could I sit and watch Bosco the snivelling little hand puppet. I watched that when I was four years old and even then I didn’t buy the magic door rubbish “Knock knock open wide, see what’s on the other side blah blah blah” That bloody puppet puts me in bad form just thinking about him.

It’s going be a long summer this year and i have a lot to deal with. Been stuck in my room, not getting to wear high heels, not living beside Lucy and I don’t even know whether JR is dead or alive (I don’t like JR but if Lucy goes to jail, i don’t think I’ll cope with that).

I may as well just spend the summer here in my room praying for Lucy’s soul.